Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Cover Me in Jalapeno Hollandaise

You ever had it?  Jalapeno Hollandaise?  Oh baby.  Come to Mama.  Only in California would somebody think to make an eggs benny with jalapeno hollandaise.

I'm a native you know, born in San Diego, California, not far from where surf meets turf.  Ever been there?  Opening day at Del Mar racetrack?  What a sight.  Hats and ponies mixing with sand and sea.  You have to do it at least once in your life.  I've done that one.  Now I just need to get to the Kentucky Derby someday.

Got me to thinkin.  The "to do" list.  You got one?  It rises up to the surface just a bit more when you get a cancer diagnosis.  Now I'm not getting all morbid on you, just thinkin.  Thinkin about stuff.  My to do list.
Gosh, so many things.

I've never been to the White House, or stood on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.  I'd like to do that.
Go to Key West and snorkel in reefs of wrecked pirate ships.
Sip a mint julep at the Kentucky Derby in a big, fine hat with a brim full of flowers hanging like wisteria.
Wander through the Museum of Modern Art and Natural History in New York, and eat my way through every ethnic Mom and Pop I can.  Of course, Broadway and off Broadway.
Positano.  Oh my.  That's where I'm going when all of this is over, to Positano and sip wine on the patio of Le Sirenuse.
Publish this blog as a cancer resource book, and follow it up with my novel.
Write an insider's Napa Valley blog.

That's a great start to my to do list.

Oh, drive cross country.  Never done that.  Always wanted to.  Or at least from San Francisco to Chicago.  Cool.

Wait, wait, I want to go to Maine.  Well, first I need to stop in Vermont and gets lots of butter, then to Maine.

I think you can get so busy with the grind and the hamster wheel, you forget about the things you always wanted to do and see.  I am thinking more about these.

Still so many things I'd like to do.  Wanna know what feels good though?

All I dreamed of that I have already done.

Like walk the streets of Paris and spend hours in the Louvre.
Sunbathe topless in Tahiti.
Have a beautiful wedding.
Get married.  Been there.  Done that.  Just kidding.  Kind of.
Have a baby.  I had two.
Write a novel.  and it's a good one.
Have a piano again and play and write and play.  Thank you Husband for the next best gift you ever gave me, after our boys.
Be a fabulous, present, wise, funny, loving, inspiring Mother.  My boys say yes Mama.

Sometimes you take for granted how good a simple, ordinary life can be.  Being healthy.  Paying your bills.  Loving your family.  Being a friend and having a friend. Cooking something really good to eat.  Going to the library.  Watching a great movie.  Listening to live music.  Writing a letter.  Swimming.  Taking a walk. 

Listening to somebody talk and tell you their stuff, and it's like a confession and a prayer and is holy.

I told you Dude, relax, I said the surfing would be good today.  After a day like yesterday, what a relief to find contentment in the simple things, like sharing warm mini BoonFly donuts with a friend.

That is not to say all of today was easy and good.  A few parts of it were gut wrenching.  That's how it comes.  Some of those waves kick your ass and leave you spitting sand.

Other waves you ride in, and find the velocity you've been looking for, escaping cancer's gravity.

This is how it is sometimes.  When you have cancer and when you don't.

This is how it is.

Living the sacred ordinary. 

1 comment:

kim said...

I think that you should get your blog published. I know quite a few other people feel the same way. I hope it happens, along with all your other things on your "to do" list.

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