Note to Self

I have cleared my calendar of certain events, expectations and undue pressure on myself.

I will not have my reconstruction till next summer.

I have no plans to return to work till probably after the first of the year.

I have completed the first arduous challenge of my cancer treatment.  Five months of chemotherapy.

I will focus on the next two parts of the treatment that will save my life.  A bilateral mastectomy, October 26th.  Late November, 5 1/2 weeks of radiation.

My plans through the end of the year?  Complete my cancer treatment.  Rest.  Rebuild my strength.  Pamper myself.  Write.

It's time to put up the Fall/Halloween decorations.  My favorite season.  I'm happy I'll be home for Halloween.

I will exercise 30 minutes every day.  Walk.  Swim.  Yoga.  Tai Chi.  I may have to do this in five or ten minute increments, but I will do it.  I will work my way up to one hour each day of moving and stretching my body and making it sweat.

I will continue eating healthy foods, especially increasing my Omega 3's, fruits, vegetables and lean protein.  I will keep at a minimum any food that is in a box, can or jar.

I will do the things that bring me joy.  Writing.  Planting something.  Singing something.  Scrapbooking.  Taking a walk with my camera.  Trying a new recipe.

I will meditate, pray and journal my affirmations and intentions.  Every day.  Deep breathing.  Clearing my mind.  Asking for guidance.  Stating and journaling my affirmations and intentions.

I will spend time in nature, whether it's a walk along the strait, or sitting out in my yard.  I will spend quiet time in nature every day.

I will allow myself to grieve what needs grieving, and do my best to let it go, to allow space for what is on its way.

I will embrace that transformation requires change.

I will embrace that the good in life comes woven in with the bad, and despite all the heartbreak and challenges and suffering, life is good and so worth it.

I am not in control of what happens.

Only my reply, and here it is:

Love.  Love.  Love.