Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Why Would Somebody Leave a Cake Out in the Rain?

My appointment is at 11:30 tomorrow, at the gynecologist's office.  Biopsy pathology should be in.  Gulp.

Appointment with The Good Witch is on Friday, to discuss whatever the news is.  Double gulp.

I've done fairly well this last week, keeping all the what ifs at bay.  They mostly come at night, after all the boys and doggies in this house are sleeping.  Each night, when the house is quiet, the tension builds, and tonight is the worst.

I did pamper myself today, went to physical therapy even though I thought about canceling right up until I said goodbye to the doggies and locked the front door.  I'm glad I went.  Dean was so cute, I told him about my week since seeing him last Tuesday.  I was touched by the sadness on his face.

"Ok, today, I think we should forgo our usual therapy, I'm going to give you a massage to help with your stress.  I'm going to turn out the lights, and I just want you to relax and try to clear your mind and relax your body."  Yes Master.

He gave me a little pep talk while he massaged my back and neck and head, and I could feel his concern come through his hands into my body.  I'm so glad I went.  I felt a whole lot better when I left and for most of the afternoon.

I decided I needed a little retail therapy, so went to my favorite thrift shop, dashing in the rain to get inside, hoping I would find some cheap treasures.  I lucked out with four great book finds -

The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho, which I have always wanted to read.
One Thing at a Time (100 Simple Ways to Live Clutter Free Every Day), by Cindy Glovinsky
Why I Wore Lipstick to My Mastectomy, by Geralyn Lucas
Great Songs by the Ladies, a piano book with some of my favorite ballads in it, like MacArthur Park.

After I got home, I read a little from each, and then played and sang MacArthur Park for awhile.

I will take my life into my hands and I will use it, I will win the worship in their eyes, and I will lose it.  I will have the things that I desire and my passion flow like rivers to the sky, and after all the loves of my life, oh after all the loves of my life, I'll be thinking of you and wondering why. 

I've always wondered about the great Jimmy Webb lyrics.  Did you know there is a real MacArthur Park in the city of Angels?  Someone left a cake out in the rain there.  Why would you leave a perfectly good cake in the rain?  It's a great metaphor, a lover's lament.  I love that song.

My fingernails are so long right now, when I play the piano, my nails click on the keys just like my Mom's used to when she played.

I played again tonight, not sure which I needed to hear more, the music or the clicking.


Sharon's Cottage Quilts said...

Hello Deb, I'll be with you in spirit today~but at home..chuggin' out prayers like a freight train. That massage sounds wonderful..a very insightful therapist. Hugs and more hugs!-Gooey mess
P.S. I've been singing that song for what...30 years?? Never got the meaning of it! Thanks so much for the clarification. Actually the 70's are still kinda blurry for me! Ha! Thinking of you friend, Sharon

Mimi said...

What an emotional time. I'll be praying.

I never really got that song, so I'm glad you posted some of the lyrics.

Hugs & love,

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