Tuesday, May 3, 2011

It's Finally Happening

Seven months out from chemo, my hair is really sprouting, getting thicker and fuller on the sides and  crown.  My bangs and at the nape of my neck are not coming in as strong.  I miss bangs!  I have these short little curly bangs that aren't long enough to comb to one side or the other.  I still feel naked without all my big hair, I didn't realize how much I hid behind it.

The crazy growth spurt with my fingernails appears to have come to an end, awwww.  I don't know if it was hand washing dishes, or the return to work, but my Barbra Streisand nails are gone.

Six months out from my BLM, the tightening, tingling and numbness under my arm and on the side of my chest continues.  Since my return to work, I notice my left arm and chest wall tighten throughout the shift, and I really have to work that wing to get it to loosen up.  I am happy that all of the neuropathy in my hands appears to be gone, and I have not had any problems carrying trays of cocktails, or setting them down one by one with a full tray in my hand.  I am still regaining hand and arm strength, which makes opening some bottles of wine a challenge.

Only three months out from radiation, the extreme fatigue I had is getting better, and I don't really have a problem making it through a work shift because of that.  It's more about my right foot.  I realize now, in that year of work prior to my diagnosis, I was so so tired.  I thought it was cause I hit fifty, but realize now it was my undiagnosed breast cancer.  If I didn't have this issue with my foot or left arm, I'd be doing very well at work, considering what I've just gone through.

I am adjusting to wearing the mastectomy bra and prostheses, although I notice some distinct wrinkling on Flopsy, due to being folded up into the cup.  Mopsy is very malleable and has no problems being in the bra.  Flopsy, the radiated side, is still considerably stiffer and thicker and doesn't bounce back as well after the bra comes off.  I rub her up with cocoa butter and that helps but I am not wearing the bra during the day or when I don't have to.  It's not that it's uncomfortable, I've gotten used to it.  I just don't like stuffing Flopsy and Mopsy in there if I don't have to.  On a side note, I keep forgetting to tell you that much of the freckling and spots from radiation on the underside of Flopsy are fading.

Every day I am having longer periods of time where breast cancer is not at the forefront of my thoughts.  What a relief and welcome break!  It's wonderful.  I haven't started writing my speech yet, I've been resisting because the breaks from breast cancer are such a treat.

Since my return to work and despite the physical limitations and strapping on fake boobs, this is the closest to normal I've felt in a year. 

It's such a relief, so I'm not looking forward to getting my labs done at the end of the week.  I'm praying my veins aren't going to rain on my parade.  Please oh please oh please.

Every day I am shedding my cancer patient persona, and embracing myself as a cancer survivor.

It's finally happening.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear Sweet Lady ~
Shine, shine, shine ... you deserve it! Hugs and Kisses xoxox

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